Thursday, February 26, 2009

So Now What?

Sometimes life sends us away from where we think we are going. Now and then a bump in the road, a misfortune, a fork, a turn, a lucky streak; no matter how you put it, something leads you in a different direction. Once in a while it is a gut feeling. Sometimes we say it is our heart. Whatever happens, we made a decision or were forced to make a decision and now we are on a different path.

What if we miss that directional change? Is it possible to force yourself to stay on a path that is not intended for you? How certain are our gut instincts? Can we go against the forces of nature?

I don't really know the answer to this. I would like to believe that everything happens for a reason whether it is marriage, divorce, death, a promotion, a move, or a job change. Perhaps it is that large things in life are left to fate but smaller things like how we treat our body, is left to us?

Anyway. I want to know where I am going. I want to know what fate has in store for me. I have changed schools, changed majors, started in art, come back to art and now that I'm graduating in May I am left asking the question again...

Is this where I belong? Is this what I am meant to do? Am I a Graphic Designer, or am I a writer? Career tests tell me that I could be any of these but the number one thing has come out to be a writer.

How do I know which road to take? What are my guts telling me? Where do I go from here? I don't really know. I think it is possible to have frustration and confusion cover up whatever your gut instinct is.

So Now What?

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Who am I? I am many things in one; a constantly changing package. I am a friend, a sibling, a daughter, a listener, a learner, a poet, and an artist.